There is a question that sometimes surprises you by touching your mind, it even hits you, it comes and challenges you if you are not clear about the meaning of your life, Who am I? And if at some point you question it, you will see that the usual answers are associated with labels or comparisons, due to the roles you play, your achievements or your profession.
Do you find it difficult to contact your deepest truth? Your true identity? Perhaps this is the deepest crisis that you ever go through, it defines your identity. If you can’t answer the question: Who am I? What do you want? Where do you want to go? or what do you want to achieve?
The power of knowing ourselves
What do you think could help you find the answer? You are what you do? What you feel? What do others think or say about you? All of this is part, but it is not the basis, nor does it transmit the essence of your being. These are just ideas, achievements, opinions, passing perceptions. It would be interesting to be able to identify the answers that you consider define who you are. To do this, it would be necessary to determine if you have an inner aspiration to pursue, or some aspects to preserve at any cost, because if you lose it, you could even lose yourself, what is unique to you.
We are not always willing to discover our real identity; it requires rebuilding your life and beginning to walk the path of self-exploration and self-knowledge. You have to respond with humility, sincerity and even vulnerability. Only then would it make sense. If you are prepared to enter into that personal adventure, you can begin to rebuild your life on what is stable, that does not pass away, that is not negotiable.
What helps you, gives you peace, mental health, gives you stability, increases your self-worth and reaffirms your dignity. Gestalt therapy provides a space for conscious exploration, which allows us to include all facets of our personality. The journey towards an authentic life involves accepting imperfections.
Where the responsibility of our decisions lies in being reflective in the face of our darkness, worries, sadness, because only by making the unconscious conscious, can we free ourselves from the influence of the “shadow” on our actions. The journey begins when we delve into the depths of our being, we recognize the shadows and integrate them to let our light come out.
How does therapy help us?
At a first level, it can help you identify things, people, achievements, perceptions that you know have defined your identity, as well as work, money, projects, trips. Everything you place in your daily life will guide you. But could you recognize a vocation with joy and passion in your own identity? Beyond what you know and can for yourself. You are more than the sum of your parts. This is a truth, which you must adhere to and integrate into your life.
Therapy provides you with a process that focuses on self-knowledge, as a path to personal healing. Being aware of how we are in order to know ourselves is essential for our well-being. Through it, you find your essential qualities, your strengths and your own weaknesses.
Psychotherapy is an accompaniment where you can discover what you are truly feeling and needing, what is hidden from the light of consciousness, so that you can connect and relate it better to your inner world. What you acquire through this work allows you to be more aware of who you are, what you really want and to be at peace with your life. At the same time, it prevents you from a lot of suffering and gives you personal well-being.
Locate an image of yourself when you were a boy or girl, if possible have a photograph that you like, with which you connect. Remember what your family was like, the relationships between all the members. Identify the positive and negative aspects with each one: Father figure, mother figure, grandparents, brothers, friends, family, close people and even your community. Let your memories flow.
- What did you receive and what would you have liked to host?
- Did you carry over any experiences with someone in particular to other relationships?
- What are the lies you believed?
- Have you believed yourself to be self-sufficient, that you don’t need others?
- Do you have many wounds to heal?
- Have you had to please others?
- How do you connect today in your relationships, partner, friends, children, grandchildren?
Elements that help you redefine your life, your history and your mission
The time has come to recognize that no one can give what they do not have, that is why each one gave you what they could give you. Now is the time to accept and accept yourself, to love and love yourself, to heal wounds and release pain. To build your authentic identity, develop what is your own and recognize your value. Your life is a valuable gift. And therefore, with a purpose.
- Identify what moves you, where you flow, what thrills your heart.
- Recognize your talents, what comes easy to you and what you excel at. What are your skills, what are you really good at.
- You can explore the needs of your environment, among those around you. How could you help?
- It doesn’t hurt, although it is not what defines who you are, that you think about what capabilities others recognize in you. They could always give you clues on where to grow and develop.
- Identify if your relationships with others are healthy, free, stable.
- Always remember the truths of your story, those are what define you unique and unrepeatable.
As you find your answers, you will find it easier to be yourself when you interact with others. If you recognize your personal wounds and heal them, you avoid possible problems in your daily relationships. A look inward opens paths outward for us.
The looks of self-knowledge
These are the questions that place us, like: Where am I? or Where do I want to be? Which in turn demands you, but, above all, they guide you and become a personal thermometer. That is the path of self-knowledge, with complete sincerity, how you see yourself, what you like and what you don’t. Only within yourself will you find your truth, you have to know your interior… Identify if you feel capable, frustrated, dissatisfied, at ease, satisfied or fulfilled, and thus, you explore yourself in your most intimate part.
It is that first look, which you can complete from how you feel, because you not only relate from who you think you are, but also from how you feel. Our emotional state makes it easier for us to foresee needs and establish healthy channels. This is how you go deeper, am I stressed, exhausted, tired, or satisfied, happy, euphoric?
These first steps will direct you in relation to your projects, those dreams and goals that you want to achieve. In your life plan you will have to recognize what type of relationship you want, if you are willing to build, those around you who add to your projects, and also those who can limit you. Because, we need others, just as others need us. We are social beings and we live among relationships.
All ideas, whether correct or not, are transferred to our identity, objectivity and subjectivity, and merge into our experience. Keep in mind that your identity is not only what you do and how you feel, but what you are. As Fritz Perls said, “Only when we are willing to recognize and embrace all the parts of ourselves, even the ones we fear, can we experience wholeness and authenticity in our lives.”
You will thus achieve your next steps in self-knowledge. To be able to take responsibility for your life and your relationships, to love beautifully and live differently, to establish freer and healthier bonds. To build your own identity. Certainly, you are unique, valuable and unrepeatable!
