Why do we forget? Tons of tips…

The memory expert in me wants to remember everything, the AI expert wants to forget with some acceptable rate. Both are right. And I also do not want my brain to age. Is there anything we should do about it?

Mechanism of learning

Forgetting is an important mechanism of learning. The faster we forget, the easier it is to learn new things. At the same time, we control the things learned previously less accurately and totally forget some important information. In a stable environment, the more mature we are, the less likely we are to encounter new information, so our learning rate is reduced. This is how we train neural networks, and this is how mother nature programmed us.

Tip: Do not waste time to acquire the information you are not likely to use.

Voluntary memory

As we age our involuntary memory stays about the same, but our voluntary memory is reduced. Of cause, if we are proficient with memory training, we will still remember better than those who did not train. Also, involuntary memory does not suffer, which means that only the learning rate is reduced.

What is voluntary memory? When we notice something and want to remember that thing with all the relevant details. But we also do not want to forget the things we noticed when we were younger. As only a certain amount of information is readily available for recall, we will be forced to remember less.

How do mnemonic devices help? We actively recall only the anchor visualizations, everything else can be recalled in relation to the previous piece of information.

Tip: Use mnemonic devices to overcome the basic limitations of memory.

Control your focus

The common reason we forget where we put the keys is that we failed to notice. There are two main ways to remember where the keys are: put them always in the same place and notice very well the location we put them. A memory master would say: use also some other items associated with the keys. For example, you can put the keys in your hat and remember where your hat is. The hat is larger and harder to lose.

A different way to control the focus is creating the story: which specific event made me put the keys where I did, or which event will cause me to find them.  For example, if I needed to leave the keys for my wife I would use the place both of us expect.

Yet another way to find your keys is putting them on a spot that naturally drives our focus, like the ugliest art piece in the room.

Tip: If you are focused on something, you are less likely to forget.

Dealing with traumas

Traumas have a strange effect on our memories. We are voluntarily trying to forget the traumatic event so they do not hurt. At the same time, everything in the traumatic event is remembered with exceptional details, e.g. “flashbulb memory”.

Here the human need contradicts the AI training wisdom. A rare and traumatic event is probably very important. We never want to have it again, and we must remember it with utmost clarity so it never happens again, and if it happens we will be trained to handle it. This means we need to feed the event through the memory to ensure we will never forget.

At the same time, we voluntarily avoid it as we do not want recurring painful experiences. So the brain needs to feed the event when we do not have any control, for example when we sleep.

Tip: If you want to forget a traumatic experience, try replacing some details with less painful details. The brain is programmed to remind you stuff anyway, so at least reduce suffering.

Selective memory

We tend to remember the things that are perceived as helpful. They can be instrumental, joyful or entertaining. Sometimes we remember cautionary information to be on the safe side. If we see something contradicting the way we perceive reality, our brain might filter that information.

AI needs to be fast and accurate. If we add other cases to consider, there is a price both on speed and accuracy. These cases need to be very important, or they should be ignored. Our brains ignore rare information unless it is very important.

Tip: Do not make yourself remember something boring because it will be on the exam. Try to understand why it is moving you on a deeper level: curiosity, awe, fear, joy…

Forget intentionally

If we want to learn something new, it makes sense to forget the old stuff intentionally. For example, when changing the environment in order to adapt we forget a lot of stuff. It has actually been proven to enhance language learning and some other abilities.

Tip: Changing the environment will make you learn faster, but it also will make you forget faster

Procedural memory

The brain does not forget how to do stuff, for example how to ride a bike. This sort of memory is very different from the declarative memory. We may be very effective doing something, yet forget why we do it and what it is that we do. This is useful, because learning to actually do something is a slow and dangerous process and we do not want to relearn it. When a predator learns how to hunt as a cub, the last thing he needs is forgetting how to hunt.

Tip: Your mind might forget things, but your muscle memory may still remember them.

Unconscious memory

If we do not recall something actively, it does not mean we forget it. We might have all the memories required nested deeply within our mind. What we need to actively recall is some sort of anchor. Once any part of our memory catches up with the things we can easily recall, the other stuff may surface.

Tip: Only a small part of the memories can be easily recalled. Make several anchors and associate them with other ideas and you will eventually recall.

Pro tip: You might not recall the actual piece of information, but you might remember quite well the process that helps derive it. Do not be lazy, use that process. For example, google up the related word combinations.

Forget me not….